a beautiful gift called nausea

if someone would have told me in my formative years that pregnancy induced nausea would bring me great joy i would have laughed… no guffawed in their face, perhaps rolled my eyes and even snorted with sarcasm. but over the last few nights as i feel the nausea begin it’s nightly pass, i only feel one thing. hope. well that, and the urge to remain perfectly still so i don’t get dizzy. last night i even waited a few minutes once it started before i began to shove crackers into my mouth to make it stop. i just needed a few minutes to believe it was there, to believe that so far things are happening inside me and to remember that we have come a long way since october when everything came crashing down. i know of course that it is still early. that all this came leave us as quickly as it came but still that wave makes gives me peace for at least one more night.

today i am 5 weeks pregnant. the next two weeks will be nerve wracking to be sure. we’ll have our first ultrasound on wednesday. it will be too early to see a heartbeat. then another week will pass and perhaps we’ll get to see that flicker. and hope will extend. the next two weeks will also bring us (hopefully) past the date where things turned south last time around.

it’s also so weird to me how completely different i feel this time around. last time after a few days of minor cramping i felt completely normal (albeit a little sleepy) for the next few weeks. there were a few days towards the end where i felt waves of nausea, really quiet waves. and then everything went quiet.

this time around after 4-5 days of intense cramping, i have to say the feelings haven’t stopped coming. i have some form of stretching or pinching or light cramping most days. i am exhausted beyond belief. each night around 9pm the nausea sets in. which i have to say is so much better timing that being hit with it during my commuting hours. thank you embryo(s)!

so what’s with the differences. is it just my body reacting differently this time around, is it the gender lore, boy vs. girl. is it the fact that perhaps there are still two in there? (ok that one still freaks me out to type. he he).

whatever the reason i’m going with it. we’ll see where it takes us.

7 Responses to “a beautiful gift called nausea”

  1. Riley Says:

    Enjoy the nausea – as crazy as that may sound! People who get pregnant so easily and then complain about all the symptoms just don’t understand what it’s like for us – how something like being nauseous can send us over the moon! I’m so happy for you and look forward to hearing more as you proceed down this path – especially as you find out if you have twins or not! Hang in there.

  2. peeveme Says:

    I understand…it’s reassuring to have SOME evidence that you are pregnant. Best of luck on Wednesday.

  3. peeveme Says:

    Hi, Thanks for your reassuring comment. It’s nice to know-of someone who knows of someone who has had it and it turned out fine in the end. I think it will be fine if I can just “void” regularly (void is the medical term for peeing–ha ha)

  4. kate Says:

    “5 weeks pregnant”
    what a simply delightful phrase. Good for you- I am so happy for you!

  5. Sarah Says:

    bring it on!!! can’t wait to hear about the u/s!

  6. Cara Says:

    Loss definately blesses us with perspectives other don’t understand. Enjoy every minute – 5 weeks and counting…xoxo

  7. Stacey Says:

    Thanks for the comment! Your little comment in your post about cramping made me feel so much better! We, too, lost our first little one back in October and I was a little sleepy and had very faint cramping. This time, however, although I know it’s early… I am EXHAUSTED and the cramps are really intense when they come rolling through. Luckily they don’t stay long, but when they do, they come with power!

    I’ll be checking back on you! 🙂

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