after all that stress and drama for some reason today was a day to clear my head.
after googling my head off all night and day and realizing more and more that some thing just didn’t seen right with the grave forecast i was given yesterday. at only 6w, day 1 why would my RE be so sure that things were turning south because there was no heartbeat. we haven’t seen one yet and it’s quite common to not see one until later in week 6 or even week 7 or 8. also, they didn’t draw blood to at least check my HCG levels.
so today i called my midwife and explained the situation, she sounded much more upbeat and seemed pretty confident that i wasn’t miscarrying, but that the bleeding might be implantation bleeding (which seems late to me) or that it is just normal uterine growth bleeding. since yesterday i haven’t had any more cramping, i really only had them yesterday a.m. and the only remnants of the bleed today is some barely there dark brown on my pad. other than that i feel really great today.
so i went to the midwife’s office and had my blood drawn there so i can compare it on wednesday. so at least we can see where that’s at and for now i am just back to calm. i am still worried of course, but i feel way more in control of myself than yesterday. i still know i can’t control what happens but my midwife allowed me to see the sunny side of the street. she thought everything sounded normal and unworrisome and that if i was to miscarry i would feel a lot more cramping and see a lot more bleeding.
so, one of the diagnosis will be correct and i’ll do my best to be ok with either, even if it will be the harder pill to swallow.
at least i can just relax a little easier knowing someone doesn’t think i’m crazy to be hopeful.